Copywriter: One who creates written content for the purpose of marketing.  I think it’s a fancy name for anyone who has to write on behalf of a business. It’s all working toward a sales conversion, right? So whether it’s for ads, social media, press releases—even your emails—it’s all part of your company voice.

But maybe you don’t feel that your copywriting skills are at their sharpest. That’s okay. It’s a learned skill. But that’s why today, I want to go over a few examples of copy before and after the magic wand of smart copywriting has done its trick. Let’s look at a few examples.

 

Too Jargon-y

Before:  Our B2B services offer custom business solutions that increase ROI, drive engagements, boost SEO, and make customer conversion easy via hundreds of hyper-connected sales team members. Tailored, strategic marketing plans will help you draw in traffic online and off-line to help you reach your full potential.

Does anyone have any idea what that actually means? Seriously. What is it they’re even trying to sell?

After:  Our goal is to help business owners reach new customers. How do we do that?

Our tailored marketing plans include services such as:

  • Copywriting audits to help increase your Search Engine Optimization (SEO)

  • Customer support and telemarketing services

  • Social Media consulting and advertising plans

  • Public Relations resources (press release creation, media kits, etc.)

 

How they’re different:

  1. Structurally, the first one is a clump of words. The second breaks down the information so it’s easier to digest.

  2. The first is full of jargon and meaningless words that don’t explain much of anything. The second is concise and highly descriptive about the business’s offerings in simple words.

 

Too Cold

Before:  Your business needs consulting services that help minimize risk, achieve measurable outcomes, and include pragmatic methodology to help determine which areas hold the largest opportunities for impactful spend optimization in defined time frames.

Again, what? And secondly, why is this copy telling me what I need? They don’t know me!

After:  At BlahBlah Consulting, our goal is to help business owners get the tools they need to be effective leaders. Our team has 75 years of combined experience in the business world that we’re ready to share with you.

Have a question? A five-minute phone call is free. Call xxx-xxx-xxxx.

 

How they’re different:

  1. Option one has a very negative tone that speaks down to the reader. Rule of thumb: Never tell your customer what he/she needs. It’s too blunt. Option two is much more conversational and friendly.

  2. The first example doesn’t have a call to action that provokes the reader to get in touch with the business. The second option does (and it’s free!)

 

Too Informal

Before:  If your biz needs custom printing, call OTP Screens!! Weve got lots of colors to choose from and fill your orders ~FAST~. T-shirts, banners, signs…we print everything and our prices wont be beat by other print shops in the area so remember us for your printing needs!!!

This is an English teacher’s nightmare. Run-ons, bad punctuation, abbreviated words…yikes.

After:  OTP Printing prides itself on quality printing at affordable prices. Whether it’s t-shirts, banners, or signs, we ensure quick turn-around and attention to detail.

Have a project in mind? Get a free quote.

 

How they’re different:

  1. Option two improves spelling and makes copy more polished and professional.

  2. The clear call to action in option two makes it easy for the customer to understand what they need to do first.

 

When it comes to being a better copywriter, the bottom line is: keep it simple, don’t speak over people’s heads, and be clear about your offerings and how they can be attained. Words are powerful tools—use them to your advantage!

 

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